Til Debt Do Us Part

Til Debt Do Us Part is unfortunately becoming a more common phrase these days. You may have been dating for several months or several years and are now ready to consider marriage. Congratulations! How exciting! When couples begin considering marriage, they ask each other many important questions to further gauge the potential of each being a life long mate.

They usually question each other's views on childrearing, their idea of a dream house, their perceptions of love and commitment, after all marriage is supposed to be til death do us part.


Many couples, however, fail to discuss their financial statuses or views about finances and all too often are dismayed after marriage to learn the hidden clause of marriage: Til debt do us part.

Numerous statistics bear out that money is the number one reason why many couples argue and many more who are divorce cite money battles such as partners keeping secrets about money, deciding to combine or not combine finances and dealing with debt brought into the marriage by one or the other partner (which, by the way, becomes shared debt) as a main reason for the divorce.

Being in a marriage til debt do us part can create enormous stress and conflict within a marriage because debt can have such an impact on many areas of a couple's life and life style. Debt, for instance, can play a major part in a couple's decision to delay having children due to the financial burdens already incurred.

Debt can impact a couple's ability to obtain credit cards and loans because both credit scores are usually taken into consideration when companies consider lines of credit. Considering the stress and negative consequences that can be associated with debt, it is not difficult to understand how debt can lead to dissatisfaction and divorce in a marriage.

However, the hidden clause of til debt do us part that one assumes after taking marriage vows does not have to lead to dissatisfaction and divorce in a marriage. There are a number of things that a couple can do to enhance their chances of a successful and happy marriage.

It is ideal to discuss debt with your significant other before getting married. It is a good idea to sit down with each other and honestly discuss financial issues such as the number of credit cards and balances of those cards that each partner has.

Second, you should both discuss how you each manage money (i.e. are bills paid on time or do one or both of you frequently have collections calling or pursuing to collect payments?). Lastly, you each want to discuss your spending habits (are either of you lavish spenders?

Is one partner more conservative about spending than the other?. Of course there may be no one right or wrong answer to these questions; however, it will be beneficial to have these questions answered to alleviate many surprises that may arise throughout the marriage.

If neither of you had the opportunity to discuss these matters before marriage, there is still good news; being in debt til us part doesn't have to cause the parting of your marriage. As in the case of the couple who is considering marriage, communication and honesty are ideal if you are a married couple who is dealing with debt. It is good if you talk frequently and honestly about how the both of you will work together towards the goal of reducing and/or paying off debt.

Second, don't hide finances or major purchases from each other and lastly, honesty address feelings associated with debt and come together to create an action plan to eliminate debt.

Sign up


Copyright © 2010 GCI, LLC All rights reserved